Troy is also a fantastic copy editor, cake decorator, artist, and resident Necromancer. He practices Vodou, mummifies animals and talks to demons in his spare time. He is an absolute joy to have around the office and is constantly entertaining us with his crazy stories.

And recently, Eraserhead Press published Troy’s first novella through our New Bizarro Author Series that is like The Little Mermaid meets Hellraiser. It is titled Seven Seagulls for a Single Nipple.

To learn more about Troy and his work you can follow him on Facebook .

Thank you for everything Troy! I look forward to year 2.

Love,
Rose

This will be the first official bizarro fiction movie to be made, but we can only make it happen with your help!

Please donate to the ROSE kickstarter campaign, a film written and directed by Eraserhead Press author and editor, John Skipp.

In these remaining 42 hours, every dollar counts! We will only get the money if the goal is met.

It is currently at 97%. So close!  Then the bizarro zombie musical magic can happen for real! So help a filmmaker out!

Go here: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1676362079/john-skipps-rose-the-bizarro-zombie-musical

It gives me immense pleasure to introduce the newest member of the Eraserhead Press Team, John Skipp.

Writer/editor/longtime literary troublemaker John Skipp helped invent splatterpunk, inspire Bizarro, launch modern zombie fiction, and turn on generations of readers to exciting alternative prose.

Skipp is one of the most enthusiastic, infectiously cheerful, vivacious, hard working people you’ll ever meet and he’s been a supporter of Bizarro since before it even existed.

If Bizarro is the literary equivalent of the “Cult” section in a really cool video store, then Skipp’s new Eraserhead imprint, Fungasm Press is the equivalent of the Coen Bros., Tarantino, Jeunot’s AMELIE, Michel Gondry’s THE SCIENCE OF SLEEP, Alex Cox’s REPO MAN, or the David Lynch of TWIN PEAKS.

Where most Bizarro takes place in an entirely Bizarro world – Pancake Island, for example – Fungasm Press grounds its weirdest ideas in contemporary realities, meeting at the freaky juncture where genre and mainstream collide with indescribable strangeness.

Fungasm will feature “short, intensely alive books with all the boring shit left out,” Skipp says. “With giddy momentum and a shameless desire to both provoke and entertain, they’re fun-to-read modern stories about sad, beautiful, horrifying things.

“Our first title – Laura Lee Bahr’s debut, HAUNT – is kind of like HOUSE OF LEAVES, only fun (laughs), or a slightly less high-toned McSweeney’s. It’s a stunning puzzle box, a delicious soul-scrambler, and the perfect book to kick off the imprint.”

In addition to publishing 2-3 Fungasm titles a year, Skipp will also serve as an Acquiring Editor and Cunning Elder Strategist for both Eraserhead Press and Deadite Press. And with his feature film ROSE: THE BIZARRO ZOMBIE MUSICAL, he’s taking Bizarro to new multi-media heights.

Below is a short interview I conducted with John Skipp.

Why are you the perfect person for the job?

I absolutely love editing, and creating a showcase for writers that knock me out. My tastes are promiscuous as fuck itself, and I really love work that doesn’t fall into easy categorical constraints. Finding ways to market strangeness is one of Bizarro’s great strengths, so I feel like I’m in precisely the right place here.

What does Bizarro mean to you?

Great joy, immense provocation, and incredible opportunity.

What were your first few days working with Eraserhead Press like?

My first few days were as a writer, when Eraserhead gave THE EMERALD BURRITO OF OZ its fantastic new edition. Working closely with Carlton and the team on the cover design and sales copy, I was overwhelmed by the enthusiasm, dedication, and most importantly, the freedom to say FUCK on your covers (laughs). You guys work the way I like to work: with honesty, whole-hearted devotion, and near-constant hilarity.

What are your five favorite Bizarro books right now?

Aside from HAUNT and THE EMERALD BURRITO OF OZ? In alphabetical order, as of this moment:

APESHIT by Carlton Mellick III

THE FAGGIEST VAMPIRE by Carlton Mellick III

THE MENSTRUATING MALL by Carlton Mellick III

PERFECT UNION by Cody Goodfellow

SILENT WEAPONS FOR QUIET WARS by Cody Goodfellow

That said, I’m really loving THE CANNIBAL’S GUIDE TO ETHICAL LIVING by Mykle Hansen right now. And could name easily a dozen more writers I’m really excited about.

For more information about Skipp and his thoughts on Bizarro Fiction, check out the following video interviews:

It all started when the original Jimmy Plush entered my life, offering to take my gambling debts away if I agreed to switch bodies with him. But I didn’t know that being a three-foot-high plush toy would be such a living hell, especially now that everyone in town wants a piece of me. All I’ve gotten out of this deal is a faithful Chinese chauffeur, a custom teddybear .45, and a girlfriend who won’t take off the fox suit she turns tricks in.

Now I’ve got to keep this town clean and try to track down the real Jimmy Plush without losing my stuffing for good. Only one thing is for sure: Life is hard when you’re soft.

Jimmy Plush, Teddy Bear Detective is a high octane pulp satire. In the tradition of Sam Spade, The Shadow, Dick Tracy, Hellboy and Howard the Duck comes a new kind of hero, a hero that reminds us that the measure of a man is in his guts and his gun.

Now available at amazon.com

We knew Kevin Shamel would fit in perfectly with our full-time team because he’s been volunteering his time with us during special events over the past year and a half. He’s attended local conventions with our crew and helped us sell books, he’s assisted us at the last two BizarroCons and has been a part of the New Bizarro Author Series. So, Kevin Shamel is already a part of our bizarro family.  Last fall he signed a five book contract with Eraserhead Press, after the success of his New Bizarro Author Series book, Rotten Little Animals (which is now also available in German). His next book, Island of the Super People, will be released later this month, which is extra exciting because this is the book he wrote during Bizarro Boot Camp.

After having so many unique experience with Kevin already, he’s like a brother to us and we are thrilled to have him by our sides. I am certain that everyone who already knows Kevin will be excited for the happy news and I am delighted to introduce him to those of you who haven’t met this charming, smart, fun, enthusiastic dude.

Kevin’s job duties will be:

Super General Commander at Large—Leader of the Bizarro Brigade, an army of fans

Editor—New Bizarro Author Series

Agent of Intra-Office Affairs– Assisting With Secret Plans, Psychic Messages, Mischief, and Merrymaking

Here’s a short interview I did with Kevin where he shares more about his intentions:

What makes you the perfect person for this job?

It seems to me that I’ve been working toward this job for years. It’s my dream job. Every single duty and project that I’m working on at Eraserhead Press is exactly what I should be doing with my life. My jobs here were tailor-fit for me. And EHP is my family.

I’m going to be heading up the Bizarro Brigade, a full-on force of bizarro fans. It’s a finely-tuned international, mobilized battalion, ready to spread the word of bizarro to the world. I’m pretty sure I’m the right person to build and lead that army. I’m thrilled to have the opportunity to assemble this force. I finally get to put my years at military school to good use. I’m also joining Kevin Donihe as another editor for the New Bizarro Author Series. I’m proud to have that job. It’s perfect for me because I went through that process. I know exactly what it’s like to BE a New Bizarro Author. I’ve come out the other side with experience that I’m certain will be put to good use in helping aspiring writers find their place in the bizarro community. The word, fulfilling, comes to mind. I can’t WAIT to introduce the world to the talents of new authors, and to show those authors the world that’s waiting.

Perfect.

What does Bizarro mean to you?

Bizarro is my life. It really is. It was my life before I found Eraserhead. I AM bizarro. I’ve always leaned toward the weird things in life. Weird books, movies, situations, and pursuits. I like movies like Night of the Living Dead, Flash Gordon, Evil Dead and Holy Mountain. I was reading sci-fi masters by the time I was eight and then discovered horror. My pursuits are varied—herbs, nature, horror, punk rock, photos of the sky, anti-religiousness, sexuality, mental control, psychic healing, being a dad, writing whatever my imagination spawns, being wild, philosophizing, doing magick, changing consciously and constantly, drinking good beer, ancient history, trying to think of things without adding a state of being to them, cryptozoology, stuff like that. My history is bizarro. If you catch me sometime, I’ll tell you stories about my life that you probably won’t believe. But I don’t have to exaggerate them. I write fiction. The best kind. I spent years taming my stories to fit into mainstream magazines because they were too crazy. Now I’m encouraged to think even beyond what I thought was weird.

Finding this talented, weird and wonderful group of people out there was like coming home. They are so much like me! I met them in a black-painted house owned by an infamous Satanic dentist, where they were performing. I saw Cameron Pierce’s second Meat Magick performance (the vegetarian version). It was amazing. I won a signed can of Porn ‘n’ Beans. Carlton Mellick III and Jeff Burk also performed, and I was simply enthralled. I thought, the bizarros are my people!  Since then I’ve had such fun and amazing adventures with the EHP crew. From Bizarro Bootcamp to a retreat with the crew at their annual Sylvia Beach writing marathon, and all the totally insane conventions in between, I have had the most thrilling, life-advancing, odd, new, and bizarro times I’ve ever had. And they create amazing, interesting, bizarro books for everyone in the world. I believe that bizarro fiction is well on its way to world domination. It’s the most vibrant, alive, entertaining thing out there. It’s exciting.

Two years ago I decided to only read bizarro fiction for one solid year, to see how it affected me. It’s really my favorite form of fiction. I haven’t stopped reading only bizarro. My year came up, I announced it, but couldn’t bring myself to anything else. Actually, June 15^th marks my second year of reading only bizarro fiction. And NOW I read more of it. That’s fine by me. In fact, it’s perfect. I love being so immersed. The bizarro scene is filled with some of the most intelligent, outrageous, interesting, kind, loving, crazy people that I’ve ever met. It’s one big, weird, happy family. Bizarro is life—beautiful, weird, honest, hilarious, celebratory life.

What were your first few days working at Eraserhead Press like?

Fun and amazing. It still really hasn’t hit me completely that I’m actually doing this job. I spent my first days beside Rose, copy-editing and working with Amazon.  There was a party for the entire building on my first day—that was a nice welcome. It’s great to be in the EHP offices. There’s a happy, creative vibe that we all swim in and perpetuate. It’s really one of my favorite places to be in the whole world. Rose and Carlton went over what I’ll be doing for Eraserhead, and I’ve spent the first few days jumping into work. It’s been fabulous.

Also, there aren’t many places where your boss turns to you and asks, “Do you think butt-fur should be hyphenated?”

I knew I was right where I was supposed to be on the very first day. I’m so happy to be here.

What are your five favorite Bizarro books right now?

I’m glad you asked, “right now”. I have some ultimate favorites, but not only do I pride myself on changing my favorites up (in every aspect of life), bizarro fiction also gives me a steady stream of “the best book ever!” to choose from.

At the moment:

APESHIT—by Carlton Mellick III

ANGEL DUST APOCALYPSE—by Jeremy Robert Johnson

STARFISH GIRL—by Athena Villaverde

WARRIOR WOLF WOMEN OF THE WASTELAND—by Carlton Mellick III

THE EGG MAN—by Carlton Mellick III

I know this list is Carlton-heavy. But he is my favorite author of all time. I’d imagine that ZOMBIES AND SHIT would be on there if my kid would have gotten his shit together and finished it so that I could have read it before now. I’m just going to read my roommate’s copy.

THE BRUTALLY EVIL SATAN SHOW staring Father CARLTON MELLICK III

The High Priest of Bizarro and author more than thirty books,
including such cult favorites as “Satan Burger,” “The Baby Jesus Butt
Plug,” and “Apeshit,” brings his most notorious performance back to
Portland, OR. Featuring exploding pentagrams, brain cannons, and more
zombies than you can shake an upside down cross at!

It’s so evil . . . it’s retarded!

“Easily the craziest, weirdest, strangest, funniest, most obscene
writer in America.”
—GOTHIC MAGAZINE

“Carlton Mellick III has the craziest book titles… and the kinkiest fans!”
—Christopher Moore

ALSO PERFORMING:

MYKLE HANSEN
author of “Help! A Bear is Eating Me!” and “Rampaging Fuckers of
Everything on the Crazy Shitting Planet.”
“Brilliantly crafted, over-the-top satire.”
—THE DREAM PEOPLE

CAMERON PIERCE
author of “Ass Goblins of Auschwitz” and “Lost in Cat Brain Land.”
“Pierce is one of the weirdest, most imaginative writers around.
Toxie-approved!”
—Lloyd Kaufman

JEFF BURK
author of “Shatnerquake” and “Super Giant Monster Time!”
“Like Lloyd Kaufman and Sam Raimi’s mutant offspring.”
—Wil Wheaton

HOSTED BY:

JEREMY ROBERT JOHNSON
author of “Angel Dust Apocalypse” and “Extinction Journals.”
“A dazzling writer.”
—Chuck Palahniuk

JUNE 6th
8 pm to 10 pm
THE LOVECRAFT BAR
421 SE Grand
Portland, OR 97214
FREE
21 + only

I met Cameron at the World Horror Convention 2006 in San Francisco when he was just 17 years old.  That weekend we became friends and I got him drunk on my homebrew (though I didn’t know at the time he was underage).  We released his first novel, Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden, in 2008. Then, a year after signing his book contract, Cameron began an internship with Eraserhead Press while he was still a student at Evergreen College.  Two years later, we are releasing his fifth book and he has become the editor of Lazy Fascist Press an imprint of Eraserhead Press which he created.

Cameron is one of the most interesting, intelligent, caring and dedicated people you will ever meet. When he is not writing (which is what he does most of the time) he is editing other people’s work, sometimes even reading their novels aloud to them over the phone. He is passionate about everything he does and he has a rare imagination which knows no boundaries.

Some of the more eccentric things that Cameron has accomplished include throwing vienna sausages at the ceiling of the Seattle Center while humping a giant tinfoil centipede with a fish head for a heart, attacking a squid with a vacuum cleaner, convincing an audience to throw raw meat at each other, french kissing a fish, a writing marathon in a voodoo themed donut shop, pickling copies his books in custom made brine as special limited editions for fans, and tearing apart the pages of his book – handing each one to a person in a crowd to create a symphonic live reading of the entire novel simultaneously. And in February, Cameron married fellow Bizarro author Kirsten Alene after proposing to her while wearing a banana costume during a performance art piece at BizarroCon.

Look for Cameron’s newest book, ABORTION ARCADE, coming later this month!

Much Love,
Rose O’Keefe

The following is a list of the Top 20 bestsellers from across our entire line of imprints in 2010:

1. Help! A Bear Is Eating Me by Mykle Hansen

2. Rampaging Fuckers of Everything on the Crazy Shitting Planet of the Vomit Atmosphere by Mykle Hansen

3. Satan Burger by Carlton Mellick III

4. Brain Cheese Buffet by Edward Lee

5. The Faggiest Vampire by Carlton Mellick III

6. The Baby Jesus Butt Plug by Carlton Mellick III

7. Bullet Through Your Face by Edward Lee

8. The Cannibals of Candyland by Carlton Mellick III

9. The Innswich Horror by Edward Lee

10. Shatnerquake by Jeff Burk

11. Apeshit by Carlton Mellick III

12. The Kobold Wizard’s Dildo of Enlightenment +2 by Carlton Mellick III

13. Angel Dust Apocalypse by Jeremy Robert Johnson

14. The Haunter of the Threshold by Edward Lee

15. Ass Goblins of Auschwitz by Cameron Pierce

16. Adolf in Wonderland by Carlton Mellick III

17. The Bizarro Starter Kit (Orange)

18. Razor Wire Pubic Hair by Carlton Mellick III

19. Trolley No. 1852 by Edward Lee

20. Foop! by Chris Genoa

FOR THE ZOMBIE FAN

Zombies and Shit by Carlton Mellick III

Battle Royale meets Return of the Living Dead in this post-apocalyptic adventure.

Night of the Assholes by Kevin L. Donihe

A hilarious tribute to Night of the Living Dead where instead of turning into zombies people are turning into douchebags.

FOR THE GOTH CHICK

Starfish Girl by Athena Villaverde

A naive young girl is the last hope for a post-apocalyptic underwater dome world where everyone   are mutating into crazed fish people.

Emerald Burrito of Oz by John Skipp and Marc Levinthal

OZ IS REAL! Magic is real! The gate is really in Kansas! And America is finally allowing Earth tourists to visit this weird-ass, mysterious land.

FOR THE STAR TREK GEEK

Shatnerquake by Jeff Burk

William Shatner? William Shatner. WILLIAM SHATNER!!! It’s the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner.

FOR THE GWAR FAN

Whargoul by Dave Brockie

From Dave Brockie, the twisted genius behind GWAR, comes a novel about the darkest days of the twentieth century. The modern world is dying and Brockie is here to put a bullet between its eyes and violate the corpse.

I Destroyed Your Life
I Raped Your Wife
I Am the Fucking Whargoul

FOR THE DUNGEONS & DRAGONS NERD

Kobold Wizard’s Dildo of Enlightenment +2

by Carlton Mellick III

ARE YOU READY TO PLAY SOME DUNGEONS AND FUCKING DRAGONS?

The Kobold Wizard’s Dildo of Enlightenment +2 is an absurd comedy about a group of adventurers (elf, halfling, bard, dwarf, assassin, thief) going through an existential crisis after having discovered that they are really just pre-rolled characters living inside of a classic AD&D role playing game. While exploring the ruins of Tardis Keep, these 6 characters must deal with their inept Dungeon Master’s retarded imagination and resist their horny teenaged players’ commands to have sex with everything in sight.

FOR THE WEIRD HORROR FAN

Slaughterhouse High by Robert Devereaux

It’s prom night at a school are built with secret passageways,  where rebellious teens get zippers installed in their mouths and genitals, and once a year, on that special night, one couple is slaughtered and the bits of their bodies are kept as souvenirs. But something’s gone terribly wrong at Corundum High, where the secret killer is claiming a far higher body count than usual . . . Slaughterhouse High is Robert Devereaux’s slicing satire of sex, death, and public education.

Apeshit by Carlton Mellick III

Friday the 13th meets Visitor Q.

Six teens go to a cabin in the woods inhabited by a deformed killer. An incredibly fucked-up parody of B-movies with a bizarro slant.

FOR THE VEGAN PUNK

The Vegan Revolution…with Zombies by David Agranoff

Presenting Stress Free Food! Animal suffering is a thing of the past. Hipsters can now enjoy bacon without guilt. Thanks to a new miracle drug the cute little pig no longer feels a thing as she is led to the slaughter. The only problem? Once the drug enters the food supply anyone who eats it is infected. From fast food burgers to free-range organic eggs, eating animal products turns people into shambling brain-dead zombies – not even vegetarians are safe! In Portland, Oregon, vegans, freegans, abolitionists, hardliners and raw fooders have holed up in Food Fight, one of the country’s premier vegan grocery stores at the vegan mini-mall. There they must prepare for their final battle to take back the city from the hordes of roaming undead. Will vegans filet the flesh-eaters or will they become zombie chow? When there’s no more meat in hell, the vegans will walk the earth.

FOR THE GORE FAN

Brain Cheese Buffet by Edward Lee

You’ve seen Cannibal Holocaust. You’ve seen Salo. You’ve seen Nekromantik. You ain’t seen shit! Zombie prostitutes, religious rapists, horny werewolves, death by vomit, and sexual fetishes scraped off the sidewalk. From sex prisons to mafia torture chambers, hold on tight because you’re about to enter the perverted and twisted mind of Edward Lee. Once you’ve seen what he has to show you – there’s no coming back.

The Book of a Thousand Sins by Wrath James White

God’s a mean bastard and doesn’t give a shit about you!

The Book of a Thousand Sins collects fifteen anti-faith tales of depravity, gore, and sex from the celebrated master of hardcore horror. Be warned; Wrath James White is here to scar you.

FOR THE ECO-CONSCIOUS FOODIE

The Cannibal’s Guide to Ethical Living by Mykle Hansen

In a remote and dangerous corner of the ocean, the renowned gourmet and food journalist Louis De Gustibus is held captive by an elite chef-and vegan cannibal-named André. But André would never eat his dear friend Louis. Andre only eats millionaires! Over a five star French meal of fine wine, organic vegetables and human flesh, a lunatic delivers a witty, chilling, disturbingly sane argument in favor of eating the rich. It’s a darkly hilarious dessert to Pollan’s The Omnivore’s Dilemma and Foer’s Eating Animals-a tale of good and evil, of rich and poor, of manners, madness and meat.

FOR THE WESTERN LOVER

Fistful of Feet by Jordan Krall

A bizarro tribute to Spaghetti westerns, H.P. Lovecraft, and foot fetish enthusiasts.

Featuring Cthulhu-worshipping Indians, a woman with four feet, a Giallo-esque serial killer, a crazed gunman who is obsessed with sucking on candy, Syphilis-ridden mutants, ass juice, burping pistols, sexually transmitted tattoos, and a house devoted to the freakiest fetishes, Jordan Krall’s Fistful of Feet is the weirdest western ever written.

FOR THE HUMOR LOVER

Help! A Bear Is Eating Me! by Mykle Hansen

One of Eraserhead Press’s all time best sellers. A laugh-out-loud tale of a man being eaten by a bear.

Lick Your Neighbor by Chris Genoa

The real story of Thanksgiving. Mutant ninjas, a talking whale, kung-fu masters, maniacal Pilgrims and an alcoholic clown populate Chris Genoa’s surreal, darkly comical and unnerving reimagining of the first Thanksgiving. Put down your feathered headdresses, puritan collars and buckled shoes and prepare to get schooled in the alternate history lesson they never mentioned in grade school.

FOR THE PICKLE LOVER

The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island by Cameron Pierce

A demented fairy tale about a pickle, a pancake, and the apocalypse.

It is Gaston Glew’s sixteenth Sad Day – the sixteenth anniversary of the saddest day of his life: his day of birth – and his parents have just committed suicide. Fed up with the sadness of Pickled Planet, Gaston Glew builds a rocket ship and blasts off into outer space, hoping to escape his briny fate.

FOR THE PUNK KID

Super Giant Monster Time by Jeff Burk

Will you escape the giant monsters that are rampaging the fuck out of your city?

Aliens are invading the Earth and their ray guns turn people into violent punk rockers. At the same time, the city is being overtaken by giant monsters tougher than Godzilla and Mothra combined. You can choose to be a lone scientist trapped in a secret government lab on a remote island swarming with monstrous killer insects, a badass punk rock chick with a green mohawk caught in a bar room brawl as the city goes up in flames around her, or a desk jockey forced to endure tedious office duties while his building is being attacked by a gargantuan centipede with claws the size of sports utility vehicles. Which character will you become? Choose from over 50 different endings and shit.

Punk Land by Carlton Mellick III

A completely retarded tribute to Kurt Vonnegut’s BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS, for punks.

There are many different places you can go to after you die. One such place is PUNK LAND, the punk version of Heaven. It is an anarchist’s utopia of independence and individuality, where the parties are wild and the music is fierce, where everyone is allowed to be whoever they want to be… or, at least, that’s how it was in the beginning. Now, something is different about Punk Land. It doesn’t seem to be the same place anymore. Perhaps it’s the new punk handbook that everyone must follow, which explains what is punk and what isn’t. Or maybe it’s the introduction of the punk point system, where every citizen must retain a certain number of punk points or lose their citizenship. It could be the organization of the Punk Police, which enforces punk behavior and mohawk size. Or there might just be something wrong with the Punk Council, the new corporate government of Punk land. Either way, Punk Land just doesn’t seem to be very punk anymore…

FOR THE JUGGALO

The Cannibals of Candyland by Carlton Mellick III

Well, no, not really. But everytime I sell this book at a fan convention the juggalos are always drawn to it.

An erotic horror novel set in Candyland, like a mixture of Clive Barker and Willy Wonka.

There exists a race of cannibals who are made out of candy. They live in an underground world filled with lollipop forests and gumdrop goblins. During the day, while you are away at work, they come above ground and prowl our streets for food. Their prey: your children. They lure young boys and girls to them with their sweet scent and bright colorful candy coating, then rip them apart with razor sharp teeth and claws.

FOR THE ROMANTIC

Zerostrata by Andersen Prunty

Like Terry Gilliam at his most surreal, directing a re-imagination of Hansel and Gretel.

Hansel’s life is changed forever when he meets Gretel, a free-spirited woman who runs naked through the woods every night. She teaches him about a world of magic and beauty. They travel to the moon together via a rope ladder, sail back to earth in an air balloon, and wander through a graveyard that allows them to view the dreams of the dead all while trying to escape Gretel’s evil Grandmother.

The Egg Man by Carlton Mellick III

It is a survival of the fittest world where humans reproduce like insects, children are the property of corporations, and having a ten-foot tall brain is a grotesque sexual fetish.

Lincoln has just been released into the world by the Georges Organization, a corporation that raises creative types. A Smell, he has little prospect of succeeding as a visual artist. But after he moves into the Henry Building, he meets Luci, the weird and grimy girl who lives across the hall. She is a Sight. She is also the most disgusting woman Lincoln has ever met. Little does he know, she will soon become his muse.

FOR THE CHILDREN

The Faggiest Vampire by Carlton Mellick III

An illustrated children’s tale reminiscent of the works of Edward Gorey and Roald Dahl, for both children and adults.

Deep in The Land of Broodsarrow, just outside the village of Gneirwil, and high on a cliff overlooking the Everbleed Sea, there stands the faggiest gothic castle that any mortal being has ever seen. Living in this ancient faggy castle is none other than the well-renowned vampire, Dargoth Van Gloomfang. The citizenry of Broodsarrow sure has its share of faggy vampires, but old Dargoth has always been by far the faggiest of them all. That is, until a new vampire came to town. A younger, hippper vampire. One that emits such a grand amount of fagginess that one cannot help but be completely overwhelmed by his presence. Now Dargoth Van Gloomfang must figure out a way to out-shine this young newcomer if he wishes to ever reclaim his throne as… the faggiest vampire.

FOR THE COMIC BOOK GEEK

A Hundred Horrible Sorrows of Ogner Stump by Andrew Goldfarb

Goldfarb’s acclaimed comic series, A Hundred Horrible Sorrows of Ogner Stump, is a magical and weird journey into the horrors of everyday life. Join Ogner Stump and his amorphous companion Slub Glub as they encounter demonic hot rods, voodoo tentacles, swamp witches, psychopathic surgeons, nightmarish landlords, door-to-door coffin salesmen, and the Green Fairy.

From ritual human sacrifice to the moon’s anus, they find despair, misery, and wonder in nearly everything. There is a moral lesson to be learned in each story. There must be. Andrew Goldfarb’s surreal vision is one of shadowy desperadoes and haunted love affairs, all set within a darkly antique universe. Sure to delight fans of Terry Gilliam, Harvey Pekar, and Frank Zappa.

In CYBERNETRIX, technology has advanced to the level where electronic alternate worlds can actually be created and entered by humans. The first such world created was originally supposed to be based on the electronic world from the movie Tron, but due to legal complications with the Disney Corporation the developers decided to base it instead on a B-grade ripoff film called Cybernetrix. Although the movie was a failure, the electronic world of Cybernetrix has become so popular that it has changed our culture forever.

There is only one problem:  the Cybernetrix world and the real world seem to be slowly bleeding together into one reality.

Carlton Mellick III’s Cybernetrix is a bizarro satire set in a future world where ’80s fads never went out of style, where society has completely lost interest in art and creativity, where reality is so damned boring that fantasy is the only thing left worth living for.

And besides that, BEST TRON SEX SCENE EVER!

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