Super Giant Monster Time!

Choose Your Own Mind Fuck Fest #3

by Jeff Burk

illustrated by Chrissy Horchheimer

Will you escape the giant monsters that are rampaging the fuck out of your city?

Aliens are invading the Earth and their ray guns turn people into violent punk rockers. At the same time, the city is being overtaken by giant monsters tougher than Godzilla and Mothra combined. You can choose to be a lone scientist trapped in a secret government lab on a remote island swarming with monstrous killer insects, a badass punk rock chick with a green mohawk caught in a bar room brawl as the city goes up in flames around her, or a desk jockey forced to endure tedious office duties while his building is being attacked by a gargantuan centipede with claws the size of sports utility vehicles. Which character will you become?

To become the scientist, turn to page 149. To become the punk chick, turn to page 11. To become the office drone, turn to page 77. But choose wisely! You might conquer a fleet of alien saucers with the help of a high-flying monster-slicing super cat or drown in a giant monster’s pool of sperm as it butt-fucks your office building.

What will happen next? That’s up to you! When the story hits a fork in the road, you get to choose which path to take. The ending will always be different depending on your decisions. Not only that, you can read
this book over and over again for a new experience every time!

Click to order from Amazon.com

A new section has been added over at Dark Recesses Magazine called Esteban’s House of Bizarro.  It features new bizarro fiction, news, interviews, reviews, and art.  And so far, it kicks ass!

Last month they put up a new short story by Bizarro author Cameron Pierce and this month they just put up an interview with Pierce and a review of his book Ass Goblins of Auschwitz.  There’s also a great review of Fistful of Feet by Jordan Krall.

Thanks Esteban, I’m excited for this site!

Check this out for some tasty bizarro bits http://darkrecesses.net/

Hilarious Book Cover blooper up on Rediff Books an online book seller in India.  Washer Mouth: The Man Who Was a Washing Machine by Kevin L. Donihe (Eraserhead Press, 2009) has the cover for The Sexual Paradox Troubled Boys Gifted Girls and the Real Difference Between the Sexes by Susan Pinker.  You can buy it for 531 Rupees!

Years ago, Eraserhead Press published a chapbook titled Wet Dreams of the Pope by Bart Plantenga and Black Sifichi.  The story was recorded as a radio play for Dutch public radio in 2007 and rebroadcast on Radio Joy in London recently.

It is archived online at here Radio Joy.

“The story is about a hypocritical Pope to whom a hypocritical mass of humanity were willing to forgive his annoying political gestures in favour of the far right and spiritual oppression, spiritually kicking liberation theologists where it hurts most and beatifying and lionizing the most oppressive kingpins of Catholicism.”

In other news, I recently saw this article: Pope Benedict XVI declares war on wet dreams. To quote his holiness:

“Any activity forbidden to waking Catholics is forbidden to sleeping persons too,” said the pope. “That includes everything from missionary-position sex, which under normal circumstances is quite pleasing in the eyes of God,” to sex with persons of the same gender, to sex with animals or non-organic persons. The pope further warned that Catholics are forbidden to wear condoms while they sleep because “that only increases the occurrence of improper dreams.”

Next week, three Eraserhead Press authors, Cameron Pierce , Mykle Hansen and Carlton Mellick III will be going to the Sylvia Beach Hotel in Newport, Oregon  for a three day writing marathon.  The hotel is a very unique spot, named in honor of Sylvia Beach (Shakespeare and Company) each room is themed after a different author and decorated accordingly (like the Edgar Allan Poe room pictured above, complete with pendulum above the bed).

This is one of my absolute favorite spots on the Oregon coast and is perfect for book lovers.  In addition to the awesome themed guest rooms they have a large sitting room with a fireplace and ocean view, a library in the attic, they serve spiced wine in the evenings and there are a couple of sweet kittens that have the run of the place.

This is a really inspiring place for writers to create and it’s going to be a wonderful experience for these guys. 

Cameron Pierce author of Bizarro Fiction novels Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden and Ass Goblins of Auschwitz will be completing his next book, The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island. He is currently seeking sponsors for this writing marathon. If you would like to contribute, here’s how the sponsorship levels break down:

$5 – Receive an original illustration of an Ass Goblin battling a flying shark.

$10 – Receive a signed advance copy of The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island

$20 – Receive the limited “Pickled Edition” of The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island (yes, this will really be a pickled book).

In addition, all sponsors will be listed on the dedication page of The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island.

You can send any donations through Paypal to CameronPierce@hotmail.com. If you don’t have Paypal but would like to contribute, just shoot him an email.

Cameron Says:

“For years, I’ve dreamed of going out to Sylvia Beach Hotel in Newport, Oregon for a three day writing retreat. It sounds like the most fantastic place. Every room is themed after a different author, from Edgar Allan Poe to Dr. Seuss, Gertrude Stein to Ernest Hemingway. This is the first opportunity I’ve ever had to go there, and it’s the last opportunity I’ll have for a few years.”

Thank you, and please spread the word!

RadCon 5B is a Sci-Fi/Fantasy Convention held each February in Pasco, WA.  It is a gathering of all of the freaks and weirdos in the Tri-Cities area for a weekend of fandom, costuming, gaming and partying.  This is the second year that Eraserhead Press has attended RadCon, this year as the Small Press Guest of Honor.

Three of our artists displayed work in the art show, here’s a photo of Carlton Mellick III’s art panel:

Our performance event, The Bizarro Hour featured Jeremy Robert Johnson’s ridiculous brand of Bizarro Magic, Jeff Burk performing Shatnerquake (with a special appearance by William Shatner), Cameron Pierce was a Banana Man who collected shoes for charity, Carlton Mellick III as a fiendishly brutal LARPer and Kevin Shamel who turned the audience into his puppets with the help of his mad ventriloquism skills and a zombie cat.

Earlier that day, I caught Cameron preparing for his performance by tearing apart a copy of his book:

Later, he passed out the pages torn from his book and with the help of the audience completed a full reading of the book – as each person read their page aloud simultaneously.

It was awesome!

Then we partied late into the night.  During which some hi-jinks ensued back in the hotel room:

We had an absolutely awesome time, met lots of good people, and our crew participated in over 10 different panels. Chrissy Horchheimer got dressed in a kimono, Angie Molinar sketched a live steampunk model, Cameron Pierce debated social theory and gender politics with Larry Niven, and Jeff Burk blew the minds of Star Trek fans when he proposed that in the new alternate universe of Star Trek the Borg will meet and assimilate the Tribbles.   We brought Bizarro fiction and fun to Pasco, met some cool guys that create zombie tools for surviving the apocalypse, and enjoyed seeing all our fan and  friends again.

See you next year RadCon!

More RadCon Reports from my crew appear on their blogs:

Jeff Burk

Cameron Pierce

Forrest Armstrong

Kevin Shamel

Carlton Mellick III

This weekend I am a guest of honor at RadCon in Pasco, WA. This convention is an amazing amalgam subcultures and fandom. Come visit us in the Dealer’s Room!

VS

A contest for Book Title of the Year was held over at Infomaniac.  The contest was between The Haunted Vagina by Carlton Mellick III and Ass Goblins of Auschwitz by Cameron Pierce.

Click here to see the results.